Tag Archives: IRONY

GOP’s Jesus

I saw this meme on Facebook and just had to share it. Untold millions of taxpayer dollars have been wasted on drug testing “welfare” recipients with no evidence that welfare recipients are druggies.

With that in mind this, to me, is what Jesus would sound like if he were a right-wing Republican.

jesus meme

Time Wasted in Trumpland, Part 1

south park trump banner

Donald Trump just says too much stuff to bother making a comment on each, as it happens. So for a while I’m going to try writing a weekly log or list of the more insane comments that emerge and stink up our atmosphere.

  • In spite of warnings from Constitutional lawyers and powerful military leaders, Trump insist he would be “fine” with trying US citizens in military courts, Guantanamo is high on his list of such. Due process is not as protected under military law and that’s one reason the Bush administration didn’t want Islāmic combatants tried on US soil. By the way, if you don’t know what due process is, you will if it’s denied you.
  • Much to John McCain’s disgust Trump is back on the waterboard kick. Plus much worse.
  • Trump spend a couple of days insisting that Barrack Obama and Hillary Clinton were the literal founders of ISIS. He later walked that back half a step and then took a three-quarter step forward.
  • One of Trump’s surrogates,  Katrina Pierson, appeared on a news program and insisted that President Obama had invaded Afghanistan. In spite of the news person’s attempts to set her straight she continued calling it Obama’s War.

Continue reading Time Wasted in Trumpland, Part 1

I always wanted a hero’s medal

As the day wore on yesterday I became increasingly pissed about Trump’s being given a veteran’s Purple Heart and his making such a cavalier remark about having always wanted one and it was “so tammy duckwortheasy” getting it. My piss heated up even more on seeing a photo of forever wounded warrior, Tammy Duckworth, laying in a hospital bed, missing both legs, with her Purple Heart pinned to her hospital gown. I think she was quoted as saying to Trump yesterday, that getting a Purple Heart isn’t easy (nor is it meant to be).

Continue reading I always wanted a hero’s medal

Helen Philpot; the Voice of Sanity in America

Helen Philpot may be the voice of sane America! Here’s her latest:

“Margaret, I watched that jackass in Cleveland and lost my voice.  I saw a Presidential nominee paint a picture of an America I don’t know and have never known. I tried to respond but I couldn’t find the words. I watched his wife lie to a reporter saying that she had written every word of her speech.  When she hadn’t, I watched the media say it wasn’t her fault. I tried to respond but couldn’t find the words.  I listened to children who Margret_and_Helen_on_the_ship_400x400have known only life’s riches praise a father who had made his riches by cheating others.  I tried to respond but I couldn’t find the words.  I watched an audience shout down a Senator when he told them to vote their conscience.  I tried to respond but I couldn’t find the words.  I watched amazed as Trump got more popular rather than less and truly I couldn’t find the words.   But last night, I watched a battle-worn President who had been unjustly treated and unfairly maligned rise above it all.  I watched Barack Obama, my President, paint a different picture, a beautiful picture of hope, kindness, forgiveness and humility.  And now I am going to respond because I have indeed found my words.  Screw you, Mr. Trump.  You better give your heart to Jesus because your butt is mine and I plan to kick your ass from the bottom floor to the top floor of Trump Tower and then down again.   As I live and breathe, you will never be President.  Never.

I have always said that even when I watch my P’s and Q’s, I can still spell bullshit.  Eight years ago, Sarah Palin walked onto the world stage and American politics hit a new low.   I saw a bitch and I called her a bitch.  She spewed hatred, fear and ignorance better than any hillbilly I had ever known. I have no regrets for calling her a bitch.  Palin was a joke.  Trump, however, is no joke.  He is the real deal.  He is the bitch to rule all bitches.   Trump has an ego the size of my ass (and trust me when I tell you that is one yuuuuuuuuge ass).  Everything he does is for selfish reasons, fueled by greed and motivated by power.

Salty language and a strong opinion don’t bother me.  Saying what’s on your mind is usually a good thing.  Usually.  But what’s on Trumps mind isn’t fit for human consumption. It’s just hatred, fear and plain old racism.  He put together a carnival in Cleveland to make the case that America has become a horrible place that no longer has time for political correctness.  But I am here to tell you that speaking your mind and being politically correct are not mutually exclusive.  Political correctness is having the emotional intelligence and decency not to use language, evoke images or take actions that marginalize, offend or otherwise insult people who are socially disadvantaged or discriminated against.  Kind of sounds like something Jesus would support if you ask me.

The America he described is not the America I know.  In fact, it’s not the America anyone knows.  The rest of us know an America of hard-working, compassionate people who no longer have time to hate and who don’t aspire to harass and humiliate their fellow countrymen.  The America we know wants to end poverty, end war, educate our children and take care of our elderly. We welcome diversity because we are and always have been the world’s great melting pot. Our America has been and always will be great.  Trump sees America as some ugly girl just waiting for him to take her to the prom.  It’s bullshit and we all know it.

Trump takes offense that President Obama and Secretary Clinton don’t use the expression Extreme Islamic Terrorist,  suggesting, I guess, that all Islamic people are terrorist but some are just more extreme.  Funny.  Whenever another old, white man blows up an abortion clinic, I don’t hear anyone calling him an Extreme Christian Terrorist.  Why?  Because you don’t attribute the bad actions of a few Christians to the entire Christian faith any more than you should attribute terrorism to the entire religion of Islam.  You don’t, of course, unless you are trying to stir up a bunch of ignorant mouth breathers that have been drawn to the talk radio/Fox News/Sarah Palin/Michelle Bachman brand of Republicanism that is today’s Republican base. Trump’s America seems to be one filled with roaming bands of brown gypsies raping and pillaging at will.  I guess the view from Trump Towers is somewhat skewed when you watch Fox News and listen to talk radio all day.  To him, there is evil in anyone who doesn’t bow to his perceived greatness.

Trump is partly right.  Evil is indeed alive and well in America.   It’s just not as widespread as he would like to scare us into believing.   It seems to be alive and well in about 4% of the population –  roughly equal to the number of votes cast for Trump during the primaries.   Coincidence?  I think not.   And funny enough, the worst of them all decided to travel to Cleveland last week.

Donald.  You sir are no Reagan. You are no Kennedy. No Clinton. You are no Obama.  You aren’t even a Bush. You are a self-aggrandizing, hatred-spewing, lying sack of shit.  And yes, I realize that my name- calling is just as bad as yours.  But I am not running for President.  You are.   So be a man and act like it.  Sadly, I sincerely doubt you can.

The Republican Party, the party that likes to think it has a monopoly on god, family values and patriotism, owes America an enormous apology.  Palin was bad enough, but Trump is inexcusable.  I mean it.  Really.”

Jim Jefferies – All You Need to Know About Trump

I had never heard of Jim Jefferies until driving home from Columbus and listening to the Lewis Black channel on Pandora. Here is this guy jim jefferieswith a thick Australian accent talking about guns in America. He was not opposed to guns and didn’t argue for abolishing them. He simply ripped to shreds the stupid arguments used by the NRA and its most rabid supporters to defend guns.

When I got home I looked him up on Netflix and found two specials he’d done. The special containing the piece about guns was named BARE and it was hysterical. Jefferies may not be easy to listen to by many more sensitive types. He’s pretty free with the four letter words.

Yesterday we sat down and watched his latest Netflix special, FREEDUMB. Among several topics discussed was his views about Donald Trump. Nobody I know of has boiled down the essence of Trump better than this guy.

This morning I did some Googling and found this six-minute YouTube clip of the Trump bit. We found it to be both extremely funny and accurate.

Revised – Bullshit of the Day Report

Dave Shoemaker, who writes the Shoeuntied blog, has his “Asshat of the Day” award. His readers send him photos of asshats they see who have screwed the pooch for anyone else finding a parking place. Since he gets hundreds of photos it must be touching a nerve.

I’ve decide to take a lesson from Shoe and create a Bullshit of the Day Report page in which I will post bullshit statements I come across each day. I’ve created a link to the page in the menu bar at the top of each page.

Simply click on the Bullshit Button to read the very first post. To submit your own example email me at greenfieldohio@gmail.com.

I decided to alter the format of posting BS reports. Post will now appear in regular order in the middle of the HOME page as well as in the ASIDE section along the right hand margin of every CGS page. This makes it both more user-friendly and simpler for me to administer.


The Voice of the Forgotten

The curtain has come down on the great “Let’s Polish Trump’s Turd Show” in Cleveland where, as the Washington Post said today, Trump tried to position himself, “As the voice of the forgotten men and women.”

My first reaction is that I’m pretty sure I can make the case that no person who spends his nights in a room like this…

trump bedroom 2001

…ever had much concern for the forgotten. Throughout human history people who live in such surroundings normally do so at the expense of the broken backs of the forgotten.

You want to see what the home of a person who really might represent the voice of the average person? Well take a look at this Burlington, Vermont home that happens to be the residence of recent presidential candidate and US Senator, Bernie Sanders.

bernie's homeNow be honest, in which abode do you think you’ll have a greater chance of finding someone sympathetic to your voice? This is what the average American just turned its back on, a chance to be led by one of our own.

Reflections on Nipplegate

Someone said something earlier about Ms. Trump’s modeling photos and it jarred loose this thought. Remember Nipplegate in 2004? The Super Bowl show in which Janet Jackson’s breast was very briefly exposed to the world? Janet Jackson is an entertainer and dancer who was strutting her stuff all over the world stage in a very hot number with Justin Timberlake.

Well the bare tit lasted a second but the outrage went on for weeks. Conservatives all over American wanted Congress to investigate Jackson’s boob and write laws preventing such things from happening again.

It struck me how ironic and hypocritical the far-right is when it comes to the female form. While a nano second of boob throws them into a titfit they don’t seem to give that same nano second’s concern about the dozens of scantily clad photos of potential first lady, Melania Trump. Photos that can be found in every corner of the Internet.

And speaking of first ladies. Those same hypocrites have often aimed their ire at Michelle Obama for the clothing choices she’s made. Well, I have checked with the fashion editor of Chapman’s General Store and been informed that anything Ms. Obama’s worn in public was appropriate, tasteful, and stylish.

One thing we all know, however, is that conservatives like a good set of racks as much as the liberal they’re standing the required distance from. In California they were called topless bars. Elsewhere they are known as titty bars. In conservative North Carolina they are politely referred to as gentlemen’s clubs. Inside them all the same old product is being sold.

So let’s end this with a little self reflection. Look at these three photos and tell me which stirs your carnal urges the most.

Philpot on Guns & Abortion

gunsabortionsI don’t know if there is a real person named Helen Philpot but whoever writes the Helen and Margaret blog is one of my favorites. For several years I have kept a link to their blog on my site but today Helen has things that need to be brought out from the shadows of just a link that may or may not get clicked. I’m going to post her entire piece and hope some of you might see fit to seriously consider the hypocrisy she discusses.


Margaret, within minutes of the President saying that he would be accused of politicizing this latest shooting, right on schedule Fox News accused him of politicizing it.  I swear the yahoos over at that network could start an argument all alone in an empty room.

How many times does our a President have to go on television to ask for our prayers and our thoughts  before our elected officials decide to pass sensible gun laws? Why in the world do we think it should be easier and less expensive  to get guns than it is to get mental health treatment?

Crazy people fire guns at will these days and politicians have nothing to say except our thoughts and prayers are with the victims.  But a women makes the private decision to end an unwanted or unhealthy pregnancy and those same politicians cry murder and pass laws faster than a hot knife through butter.

It occurs to me that if Planned Parenthood would just shoot the fetus with a gun maybe the Republicans would let women have control over their own bodies.   Now I know how awful that sounds, but it’s no crazier than all those NRA-card-carrying idiots who are now warning the government to keep their hands off our guns while just a few days ago they pulled Cecile  Richards into a hearing to talk about the government getting its hands on a women’s uterus.

The hypocrisy of their actions is as appalling as what I just wrote. Then again, I’m not an elected official.

If they cared so much about life, they’d work as hard to get rid of guns as they do to get rid of Planned Parenthood. But I fear the only life they care about is the one that will vote for them during the next election. Sadly, I mean that. Really.

Random Rambles: Clorox

Clorox is synonymous with ???. If you answered bleach I’m guessing you’re in the majority. It like Kleenex and tissue, the two are a natural fit. Last week I was in a dentist office and conveniently scattered around the office were pump bottles of hand sanitizer carrying the trade name Clorox. I squirted some on my hands and took a whiff expecting to smell the familiar aroma of Clorox bleach. Instead my nasal orifices detected alcohol. Looking at the label I read, right below the big CLOROX logo, “Contains no bleach.” Somehow it seems against universal law to write a sentence reading, “Clorox, contains no bleach.” No wonder this world is so confusing.