As some of you know I leave home with a mental list of businesses I’m boycotting. My reasons vary but most often I don’t like their politics or their social behavior. For example, I won’t patronize Chick-fil-A because of the opposition to gay rights and Papa John’s and Domino’s won’t be selling me any pizza because of their financial support of right-wing politicians I consider radical. To be fair, however, if the owner of Domino’s was a raving liberal I still wouldn’t eat his pizza because his pizza sucks.
In recent years I’ve boycotted the Burger King chain of fast food joints but not because I dislike their food. In fact, I like their flame broiled patties far more than those flipped at McD’s. I’ve boycotted BK because it was owned by Mitt Romney’s Bain Capital. There’s a great number of Bain Capital holdings that are on my, don’t do business with list.
Well, I just read that Bain sold BK to a Brazilian corporation and for some months now I could have enjoyed the occasional Whopper Junior. Back in the good old days a dollar would get you a WJr. which I always thought was the best dollar-menu burger to be had. I don’t know what the cost is now but you can bet I’ll have first-hand knowledge in the next few days.
Now, new BK Brazilian owner, pull up a seat and let’s talk a little about these ugly ass fries you sell. And what the crap is this new French Fry Burger you’re trying to rupture our arteries with? Are you serious?
NOTE: After writing this piece BK announced they are bringing to market a krinkle cut fry that supposedly has all the flavor but less fat and fewer calories. Untold money was spent and over 10 years of research went into these new “Satisfries.” My money is bettin’ they’re still gonna’ to be ugly ass fries and BK will still be feeding off those who don’t want to wait in the McDonald’s drive-thru line. It’s hard out there for a burger joint!